英语小笑话如题.小学的水准.对话的形式.5到6句即可.带翻译.初一英语课本上的不要。搞笑一点。分够高了。

The Fish Net
"Can you tell me what fish net is made,Ann?"
"A lot of little holes tied together with strings." replied the little girl.
鱼网
"你能告诉我鱼网是什么做的吗," 老师发问道.
"把许多小孔用绳子栓在一起就成了鱼网了." 小女孩回答道.
The New Teacher
George comes from school on the first of September.
"George,how did you like your new teacher?" asked his mother.
"I didn't like her,Mother,because she said that three and three were six and then she said that two and four were six too."
新老师
9月1日,乔治放学回到家里.
"乔治,你喜欢你们的新老师吗?" 妈妈问.
"妈妈,我不喜欢,因为她说3加3得6,可后来又说2加4也得6."
A physics Examination
Once in a physics examination,Nick finished the first question very soon,while his classmates were thinking it hard.
The question was:When it thunders why do we see the lighting first,then hear the thunderrolls?
Nick's answer:Because our eyes are before ears.
一次物理考试
在一次物理考试时,当同学们都还在苦思冥想时,尼克很快就答好了第一个问题.
这个问题是：为什么在打雷时,我们总是先看到闪电后听到雷声?
尼克的回答是：因为眼睛在前,耳朵在后.
Two birls
Teacher:Here are two birds,one is a swallow,the other is sparrow.Now who can tell us which is which?
Student:I cannot point out but I know the answer.
Teacher:Please tell us.
Student:The swallow is beside the sparrow and the sparrow is beside the swallow.
两只鸟
老师：这儿有两只鸟,一只是麻雀.谁能指出哪只是燕子,哪只是麻雀吗?
学生：我指不出,但我知道答案.
老师：请说说看.
学生：燕子旁边的就是麻雀,麻雀旁边的就是燕子.
He Won
Tommy:How is your little brother,Johnny?Johnny:He is ill in bed.He hurt himself.
Tommy:That's too bad.How did that happen?
Johnny:We played who could lean furthest out of the window,and he won.
他赢了
汤姆：约翰尼,你小弟弟好吗?
约翰尼：他害病卧床了.他受了伤.
汤姆：真糟糕,怎么回事儿?
约翰尼：我们做游戏,看谁能把身子探出窗外最远,他赢了.
A Good Boy
Little Robert asked his mother for two cents."What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?"
"I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered.
"You're a good boy," said the mother proudly."Here are two cents more.But why are you so interested in the old woman?"
"She is the one who sells the candy."
好孩子
小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱.
“昨天给你的钱干什么了?”
“我给了一个可怜的老太婆,”他回答说.“你真是个好孩子,”妈妈骄傲地说.“再给你两分钱.可你为什么对那位老太太那么感兴趣呢?”
“她是个卖糖果的.”
Drunk
One day,a father and his little son were going home.At this age,the boy was interested in all kinds of things and was always asking questions.Now,he asked,"What's the meaning of the word 'Drunk',dad?" "Well,my son," his father replied,"look,there are standing two policemen.If I regard the two policemen as four then I am drunk."
"But,dad," the boy said," there's only ONE policeman!"
醉酒
一天,父亲与小儿子一道回家.这个孩子正处于那种对什么事都很感兴趣的年龄,老是有提不完的问题.他向父亲发问道：“爸爸,” “唔,孩子,”父亲回答说,“你瞧那儿站着两个警察.如果我把他们看成了四个,那么我就算醉了.” “可是,爸爸,”孩子说,“那儿只有一个警察呀!”
Jane:mom,what's the meaning of angel?
Mom:angel is a kind of person who can fly and with wing.
Jane:but miss helen can't fly,but why did dad call her "my angle"?
Mom(with angry):really?oh,I will let her fly at once!
简:妈妈,
妈妈:天使是一种有翅膀,会飞的人.
简:但是海伦小姐不会飞,爸爸为什么叫她"我的天使"呢?
妈妈(气愤地):真的?好,我马上就叫她飞!

I'm Trying to Stop It
"Boy, why have you got cotton-wool in your ear? Is it infected?"
"No, sir, but you said yesterday that everything you told me went in one ear and out the other , so I a...

TOM'S EXCUSE
Teacher: Tom, why are you late for school every day?
Tom: Every time I come to the corner, a sign says, "School-Go
Slow".
汤姆的借口
老师：汤姆，您为什么每天上学迟到？
汤姆：我每次路过拐角，一个路标上面写着："学校----慢行。"

The Looney Bin
疯人院
Late one night at the insane asylum (疯人院）one inmate shouted, "I am Napoleon!"
Another one said, "How do you know?"
The first inmate said, "God told me!"
Just th...

teacher:Tom,how do you spell "apple"
Tom:"ping guo"

Once upon a time ,a stupid guy went to the doctor's.
"What's the matter with you",asked the doctor.
"I have been broken all!",said the fool .
"Broken all,what's it mean?",the doctor was su...

The elder brother answers a way:"Certainly want to run quickly, you didn't see a behind, is that person taking stick to make track for and beat him?"
哥哥带着弟弟去参加学校的运动会。当接力赛开始时，弟弟问：“前面那个人为什么跑得那么快？”

I'm Trying to Stop It
"Boy, why have you got cotton-wool in your ear? Is it infected?"
"No, sir, but you said yesterday that everything you told me went in one ear and out the other , so I a...

I am her mother
A:Jsut look at that young person with short hair and blue jueans.Is itboy or girl?
B:It is a girl.She is my daughter.
A:Oh,sorry,Sir.I didn't know that you were her father.
B:I'mnot.I'm her mother.

I Wasn't Asleep
When a group of women got on the car, every seat was already occupied. The conductor noticed a man who seemed to be asleep, and fearing he might miss his stop, he nudged him an...

ass and man 驴
1.和买驴的人
A man wanted to buy an ass. He went to the market, and saw a likely one. But he wanted to
test him first. So he took the ass home, and put him into the stable with t...

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