请雅思高手或者老师给我看一下这篇小作文,并给一个分数

请雅思高手或者老师给我看一下这篇小作文,并给一个分数
The chart below gives information about global sales of games software,CDs and DVD or video.
Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information.
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The following table chart demonstrates the fluctuation of global sales during the period from 2000 to 2003 insoftware of games,cds and video separately.
Obviously,the globle citizens cost the highest expense in buying cds not only in the 2000,but also in the following three years.It stood at about $35 billion at first and almost remained stable in the next few years.
Conversely,the people throughout the world paid the least attention to play computer games.It changed slightly which started at approximately $15billin(2000).The figure showed a moderate ascending trend,which increasing about $3billion at the end of 2003.
Interestingly,although dvd never took the leading position in the global sales,people gradually arouse their interests in it.The figure enjoyed a dramatic climbing tendency from about $20billion in 2000 rocketed to over $30 billion in 2003,which is smoothly less than the total sales in cds.
To sum up,the dwells in the world prefer to utilize cds rather than playing electronic games.What is more,people who choose to see dvd or videos has become more and more.