求一个三人的英语小品,以购物为话题,时间一分30秒左右就好,简单搞笑一点

赵本山：带钱了,三万,带包没有啊
we have money ,thirty thousand yuan.don't you take the purse?
毛毛：我落在炕上了
I left it on the brick bed.
赵本山：给你办事,还落在炕上了
I do business to you,but you left it?
毛毛：兜里才70多元
I only have seventy yuan.
赵本山：我还有400
Here is 400 yuan.
毛毛：也不够啊
it's not enough.
赵本山：够不够都可以的
it doesn't matter.
赵本山：服务员
waiterss !
小沈阳：你管谁叫姑娘,我是纯爷们
girl?I'm a real man.
赵本山：怎么穿裙子
why do you wear a skirt?
小沈阳：也不是裙子,这是七分裤,这有腿的,着急穿错了,
it's not,this is a seventh trousers..Sorry,I wear wrong in a hurry .may I take your order?
赵本山：
yes.
赵本山：你们这个酒店,如果要吃一顿饭,要多少钱.最贵的要点上要吃多少钱
I want to know how much it cost to have a meal,including the most expensive dishes.
小沈阳：要一、二万元
about ten or twenty thousand yuan.
赵本山：是否有这样的情况,今天吃饭明天来结帐
can I have meals today but pay tomorrow?
小沈阳：打白条
owe the money?
赵本山：不是打白条,给你小费
no,I have money,don't shorts of money.Give you tips.so many tips I have money.
小沈阳：大爷,你太帅了
uncle,I LOVE YOU .
赵本山：客人来了,我点菜的时候你要给我兜着,我要点贵菜
When The guest comes,you should help me when I am ordering dishes.If I want to order a dear dish……
小沈阳：我就说没有
I say not have?
赵本山：你太明白了
you are so clever.
毛毛：爷爷,我饿了
grandpa,I'm hungry
赵本山：给我来碗面条
take me a bowl of noodles.
小沈阳：78元一碗
78 yuan.
毛毛 :do you have the cheaper?
小沈阳:this is the cheapest,
赵本山:ok ,please
小沈阳:here is the noodle
毛毛：爷爷有一点咸了,
it's a bit salty.I want to drink coffee
赵本山：给她搞一碗白开水,
give her some water.we first try to act to order the dish
小沈阳：ok
赵本山：澳洲鲍鱼四只
Four Ausrialia’s abalones.
小沈阳：对不起没有.
Sorry ,we haven’t the dish.
毛毛:I like Ausrialia ‘s lobster.
赵本山：澳洲龙虾 Ausrialia ‘s lobster.
小沈阳：没有那么大的 We haven’t such a big one .
赵本山：有多大的.
H ow much do you have?
小沈阳：只有一斤的.
about one kilo
赵本山：这个太小了,糖醋排骨
This is too small .sweet and sour spareribs
毛毛:oh it’s great.i like
小沈阳：no have spareribs
赵本山：有还是没有啊
have or not?
小沈阳：没有的.no.
赵本山：来民间的,孩子,来一个小野鸡炖蘑菇
let's take some local dishes,boy,small pheasant stews the mushroom
小沈阳：没有
not have
赵本山：这个可以有
this can have
小沈阳：这个真没有
really not
赵本山：把带来的拿过来
take it mao：
把这个炖了,点一个笨鸡蛋
stew it,take a heavy egg
小沈阳：没有
not have
赵本山：我有
I have
小沈阳：有没有,你心里没有数吗,
aren't you clear whether we have?.
赵本山:I ordered abalones and lobster,you don't have.