各位英语达人们,帮我改改这篇英语作文呗.改出我的·语法错误,我是高二学生,可以追分的.

Dear Ram,
Thank you for your concern about the construction of Hainan International Tourism Island
The construction of Hainan International Tourism will attract more（没有比较的用many要好些） tourists ever year,and it will develop the tourism.Many （用some要合适些,虽然many也可以）people in Hainan don`t have good jobs ,but (不用转折的用and)this construction can offer more jobs.
Our Hainan is a wonderful city,after this construction,Hainan has became (will become)more and more beautiful.Besides,the traffic in our city has been better now.It goes with out saying that Hainan is reallly like a big garden,and as the matter of fact,in my opion(opinion),Hainan is the most pretty place in the world.Do you want to take a journey to Hainan,my friend?