can someone help me correct my poem?/

can someone help me correct my poem?/
this is a poem written by me recently,but i am not sure whether it's good or not,
here is starts
falling leaves
fallen hopes
broken twigs
broken hearts
stumbling through
in the dark
I hoped
that we would never part
had to face the truth
so hard
our time together
it's over
maybe we meet again
maybe
and may springs comes
when hopes come back
and my heart is mended
huangfei2004 1年前 已收到2个回答 举报

无涯石人 幼苗

共回答了10个问题采纳率:90% 举报

很好.我没有你这么大的词汇量能顺手拈来
and may springs comes - and may springs come
and my heart is mended - and my heart will be mended 是不是这样与前句联系得上点
never part - never be apart / never depart
是不是加上标点好点?我在想
祝开心

1年前

2

yyettk 幼苗

共回答了3个问题 举报

有点小错误,比如springs comes这样的,可能是笔误吧。。失恋了?满悲的哦。。我想应该写的积极的让心情高兴一点吧~o(∩_∩)o...

1年前

1
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