求批改雅思作文及评分Some people think it is more effective for student

求批改雅思作文及评分
Some people think it is more effective for students to study in groups while others think it is better for them to study alone.Which do you think is more effective?
At present days,the problem whether the students should work together or study alone is frequent discussed by many people.Personally speaking,I think the students must study in groups.
As we all known that the student will become more creative by learning konwledage together with others.Studying in groups is a consequence methodology of traditional education.It can help the learners expolit their mind and create more ideas for the answers.Students in a group can talk about problems with other peers,exchange their thoughts and make themselves smart.Another adventage of working together is that groups show the importance of coorparation to people.As a result of group-learning,students may acquire an ability ofteam spirit.They work together so that they could make full use of their own aptitute.According to this,the problem may be tackled perfectly.In addition,people who work together can address the problem efficiently.A group combats a question by all of itsteammates and this can decrease the time of proccess.
Some individuals think students should study knowledage by themselves.To be honest,it should be acknowledaged that working alone may bring some benefits to the students.People who study at home by themselves may have more time to learn the field whichis interested by them.They spend less time on schooling and classes,and therefore those people would have enough time to explore their own course.Also,the technology that present socialty provide would help students studying alone more convenient.Forexample,the information highway offer many resources of knowledage to the students.
Overall,the adventages in studying together are more than it in learning knowledage alone.Therefore,studying in groups may make the students more talented and more active in their learning life.
hbwuyi 1年前 已收到1个回答 举报

乖岁岁 幼苗

共回答了21个问题采纳率:90.5% 举报

楼上两位是托儿,百分之一万的托儿.
我先说我写作3次7分,你感觉要是凑合就信我,要是觉得我这分不够你的档次,就选一楼那新奇雅思和二楼的新东方吧.
首先第一段太短,第一句不够唬人.不用the students,直接students就可以.
第二段第一句就是语法错误,as we all know.仍然是students不用加the,这里不用特指.knowledge可以说learn,但是最好说acquire knowledge,吸取知识.consequence改成consequent,做形容词.后面的it can help改成“,which may help”,增加句子复杂性.你想说explore their minds吧.make themselves smarter吧.cooperation拼错了.acquire spirit改成be a aware of team spirit.最后一句改成time of proceed.
第三段,study knowledge是绝对不能出现的中式英语.which is interested by them,没有这种说法,改成which they may be interested in.你想说present society吧.studying alone more “conveniently”,其实这里还不如用effectively.最后一句没看懂.
最后一段第一句,还是learn knowledge,没有这个搭配.还有,你凭什么说这个就比那个好?应该在第三段中让步一下,虽然单独学习好,但是缺点是XXX,然后最后一段才可以说单独学习不如一起学的好.
总体来说,我到没看出来你用的模板,但是语法结构太单调,一句话一行都不到就结束了.还有词汇变化太少,重复使用.连贯性一般,连接词用的不够.
你要是需要6分以上,一定要多加练习,然后一定要找人改!
我给你打分的话,5分吧.
不管怎么样,中国学生的写作都是提分最难的,你一定要加油练习,多写,我就是这么提高的.

1年前

1
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