英语作文批改.题目是"Should Parents Send Their Kids to Art Classes".
英语作文批改.题目是"Should Parents Send Their Kids to Art Classes".
内容：①现在又不少家长送孩子参加各种艺术班；②对这种做法有人表示支持,也有人表示不赞成；③我认为……
批改要求：①请指出语法错误；②给出批改意见；③指出可以提高的部分；
如果批改得很给力,之后会有20的加分,
Nowadays,parents always want their kids become the achiever so that they send them to take part in the art classe.However,too much courses for children unbearable.So,there is a problem.Should parents send their kids to art classes?
Some people do really support the idea that parents should send teir kids to art classes.In their opinion,join the classes means the kids can obtain more knowledge and have a shkill.What's more,if the kids study well,they also can have more opptunities to have a success.So,why not send them to art classes?
But,the coin has two faces.here are some people disagree with these parents.In their minds,kid just a kid,their narural is playing.It is unbearable for kids to take part in too many classes.At the same time,if they don;t want to study like this,they can't study well.So,why send them to such many classes?
In short,Ithink if the kid like drawing,then send he or she to study drawing.If the kid like singing,then send he or she to study singing.Interesting is the best teacher.It is unnecessary to take part in so many art classes.If they don't want to join the classes,then let them play with each other.Happiness just is the most important thing for them.
哪些词重复的比较多？更改的话，请举一个例子好吗？
内容：①现在又不少家长送孩子参加各种艺术班；②对这种做法有人表示支持,也有人表示不赞成；③我认为……
批改要求：①请指出语法错误；②给出批改意见；③指出可以提高的部分；
如果批改得很给力,之后会有20的加分,
Nowadays,parents always want their kids become the achiever so that they send them to take part in the art classe.However,too much courses for children unbearable.So,there is a problem.Should parents send their kids to art classes?
Some people do really support the idea that parents should send teir kids to art classes.In their opinion,join the classes means the kids can obtain more knowledge and have a shkill.What's more,if the kids study well,they also can have more opptunities to have a success.So,why not send them to art classes?
But,the coin has two faces.here are some people disagree with these parents.In their minds,kid just a kid,their narural is playing.It is unbearable for kids to take part in too many classes.At the same time,if they don;t want to study like this,they can't study well.So,why send them to such many classes?
In short,Ithink if the kid like drawing,then send he or she to study drawing.If the kid like singing,then send he or she to study singing.Interesting is the best teacher.It is unnecessary to take part in so many art classes.If they don't want to join the classes,then let them play with each other.Happiness just is the most important thing for them.
哪些词重复的比较多？更改的话，请举一个例子好吗？
赞 rr博览中心 幼苗
共回答了17个问题采纳率：94.1% 举报
Nowadays,parents always want their kids become the achiever so that they send them to take part in the art classe.However,too （much->many） courses (for children unbearable-> increase the study pressure to their children to an unbearable degree).So,there is a problem.Should parents send their kids to art classes?
Some people do really support the idea that parents should send teir kids to art classes.In their opinion,( join->joining) the classes means the kids can obtain more knowledge and have a shkill.What's more,if the kids study well,they also can have more opptunities to( have a去掉） success.So,why not send them to art classes?
But,the coin has two faces.here are some people disagree with these parents.In their minds,kid just a kid,their narural is (playing->play 可以单独做名词,这样简洁,而且playing很容易和现在进行时混淆）.It is unbearable for kids to take part in too many classes.At the same time,if they don;t want to study like this,they can't study well.So,why send them to （such->so) many classes?
In short,Ithink if the kid （like->likes) drawing,then send he or she to study drawing.If the kid （like->likes) singing,then send he or she to study singing.（Interesting->interests) is the best teacher.It is unnecessary to take part in so many art classes.If they don't want to join the classes,then let them play with each other.Happiness (just is->is just) the most important thing for them.
总体写的还可以,有些小错,还有文章有一些重复用词可以变换一下,以体现表达的多样性.比如多次使用 send their kids to art class 你可以变换成 force their kids to learn art 还可以 burden their children with art class等等
再如最后一段Ithink if the kid （like->likes) drawing,then send he or she to study drawing.If the kid （like->likes) singing,then send he or she to study singing.改为 I think if the kids likes drawing or singing,provide them the conditions of both high quality teachers and lessons.
unbearable改成intolerable
多次使用的take part in 可以改为 attend ,learn in
另外我多改了一个地方（Interesting->interests)
Some people do really support the idea that parents should send teir kids to art classes.In their opinion,( join->joining) the classes means the kids can obtain more knowledge and have a shkill.What's more,if the kids study well,they also can have more opptunities to( have a去掉） success.So,why not send them to art classes?
But,the coin has two faces.here are some people disagree with these parents.In their minds,kid just a kid,their narural is (playing->play 可以单独做名词,这样简洁,而且playing很容易和现在进行时混淆）.It is unbearable for kids to take part in too many classes.At the same time,if they don;t want to study like this,they can't study well.So,why send them to （such->so) many classes?
In short,Ithink if the kid （like->likes) drawing,then send he or she to study drawing.If the kid （like->likes) singing,then send he or she to study singing.（Interesting->interests) is the best teacher.It is unnecessary to take part in so many art classes.If they don't want to join the classes,then let them play with each other.Happiness (just is->is just) the most important thing for them.
总体写的还可以,有些小错,还有文章有一些重复用词可以变换一下,以体现表达的多样性.比如多次使用 send their kids to art class 你可以变换成 force their kids to learn art 还可以 burden their children with art class等等
再如最后一段Ithink if the kid （like->likes) drawing,then send he or she to study drawing.If the kid （like->likes) singing,then send he or she to study singing.改为 I think if the kids likes drawing or singing,provide them the conditions of both high quality teachers and lessons.
unbearable改成intolerable
多次使用的take part in 可以改为 attend ,learn in
另外我多改了一个地方（Interesting->interests)
1年前
1
可能相似的问题
-
谁能帮我写一个英语作文？题目：Thank my parents
1年前1个回答
-
1年前2个回答
-
要求用过去式写一篇英语作文，题目:我的暑假，字数50.60字
1年前3个回答
-
1年前3个回答
-
1年前2个回答
-
1年前2个回答
-
1年前1个回答
你能帮帮他们吗