谁知道一些英语笑话（带翻译）简单点,课前演讲用的

There is a wanderful old Italian joke...
about a poor man who goes to church everyday...
and prays before the statue of a great saint,begging:
"dear saint,please,please,please...let me win the lottery".
Finally,the exasperated statue comes to life...
and looks down at the begging man and says:"My dear son,
please,please,plaese buy a ticket!"
中文：意大利有一个和好笑的老笑话,
说一个穷人每天都去教堂
在一个胜任的雕像面前祈祷：
“圣人啊,行行好 行行好,你就让我中彩票吧.”
被激怒的圣人最终忍不住显灵
向下看着祈祷的穷人说：
“我亲爱的孩子,那你也该买张彩票吧!”
希望可以帮到你!

有一天，我走在路上，在拥挤的大街上不小心被别人踩了脚，
正纳闷儿是哪个不看路的 只见一抬头，一老外出现在我眼前
接着他赶忙说了句：I‘m sorry.
我心里乐了，这个我知道，接着回了句：I’m sorry too.
那老外问道：what are you sorry for?
我心想，four不是四吗，接着赶忙说了句：I'm sorry five.

-There is a deer who doesn't have eye.What is its name?
-No idea.(no eye deer)
—一只没有眼睛的鹿叫什么？
—不知道。（没眼的鹿）