这是我的自我介绍,看看有没有语病,thanks……帮忙改一下吧

这是我的自我介绍,看看有没有语病,thanks……帮忙改一下吧
Hello,every one.I am a student in Wen Hai Middle School.My name is VV,and you also call me Mandy.I am not a clever girl,so I can’t speak English very well.At school,my favorite subject is Math.Many people thank it’s too difficult,bat I don’t thank so,I think it’s so easy and interesting.
I like dolphins very much,because they are very clever.And I like bees too,because they are very selfless.So I’d want to be a Candidate,I’d like to present a copy of my power to all purpose.
The Olympic Games it’s held in Beijing,it’s Chinese’s dream,on August 8th in 2008,it was achieved at last.
“One world,One dream.” We hold and close congenital dream,it sails to the Olympic Games.
进念 1年前 已收到10个回答 举报

小菜花 幼苗

共回答了23个问题采纳率:87% 举报

Hello,every one.I am a student in Wen Hai Middle School.My name is VVan hui,and you also call me "Mandy".I am not a clever girl,so I can’t speak English very well.At school,my favorite subject is Maths.Many people thank it’s too.difficult,bat I don’t thank so,I think it’s so easy and interesting.
I like dolphins very much,because they are very clever.And I like bees too,because they are very selfless.So I’d want to be a Candidate,I’d like to present a copy of my power to all purpose.
The Olympic Games it’s held in Beijing,it’s Chinese’s dream,on August 8th in 2008,it was achieved at last.
“One world,One dream.” We hold and close congenital dream,it sails to the Olympic Games.
Maths 要有"s" 句点

1年前

10

1338995 幼苗

共回答了4个问题 举报

and you also call me Mandy.可改成You can call me Mandy
bat I don’t thank so,改为but I don’t think so
Candidate改为Animal caretakers

1年前

1

fei1019 幼苗

共回答了69个问题 举报

1.every one改为 everyone
2.and you also call me Mandy.you后面加can,你也可以叫我Mandy.
3.Many people thank it’s too difficult.thank改为think
4.bat I don’t thank so.bat改为but
5.So I’d want to be a Ca...

1年前

1

此人禁泡 幼苗

共回答了55个问题 举报

你的thank注意要改为think.
第四行的bat改为but.
The Olympic Games it’s held in Beijing要改为The Olympic Games will be hold in Beijing.

1年前

1

rr器资讯 幼苗

共回答了1592个问题 举报

you also call me Mandy.->you can also call me Mandy.
so I can’t speak English very well 这句不要用so(没那么明显的因果关系呀,学英语别泄气),用and.
bat I don’t thank so->but I don’t think so注意拼写.
So I’d want to be ...

1年前

1

潜水ff 幼苗

共回答了13个问题 举报

说得很不错
前面的every one可以去掉

1年前

0

jypn2kba 幼苗

共回答了1个问题 举报

Many people thank 改为 Many people think
bat I don’t thank so 改为 but I don’t think so
So I’d want to be a Candidate 改为So I want to be a Candidate(不必那么费事和委婉)
The Olympic Games it’s held改为 T...

1年前

0

planetx 幼苗

共回答了123个问题 举报

Hello, every one. I am a student in Wen Hai Middle School. My name is VV, and you (加can) also call me Mandy. I am not a clever girl, so I can’t speak English very well. At school, my favorite subject ...

1年前

0

ww用来谈ww 幼苗

共回答了3个问题 举报

Hello, every one. I am a student in Wenhai Middle School. My name is VV, and you can also call me Mandy. I am not a clever girl, and I can’t speak English very well. Of all the subjects,I like math be...

1年前

0

扬尘按扫 幼苗

共回答了4个问题 举报

太简单了 而且没有闪光点 用了太多的简单句

1年前

0
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